Does the “Carefree Black Guy” Exist?

In the past couple of years, the “Carefree Black Girl” movement has been on the uprise. While there is debate on where the phrase originated, Tumblr, Twitter, and blogs have spread #carefreeblackgirl all over the internet. I even have it in my Instagram and Twitter profile bios. To me, a carefree black girl is a black girl that is unapologetically herself. She is aware of her oppressions, but chooses not to let it hinder her self-love. She is free, open, and multidimensional. She knows that she doesn’t have to fit into a certain mold, and that’s okay. She artistic, creative, and has a style that is for her. I appreciate the movement because it gives me a space to be myself.

Carefree black girls are everywhere. I see celebrities like Solange, Janelle Monae, and Willow Smith embrace their inner Carefree Black Girl. I read blogs, and follow pages on Facebook like Afropunk. I hear them on my new favorite podcast, “Another Round“. I comforted daily by all of the Carefree Black Girls I see on my Instagram timeline. But in my comfort, I can’t help but wonder if the Carefree Black Guy exists. I wonder if there is an acceptable space for them. Continue reading “Does the “Carefree Black Guy” Exist?”

10 of the Most Attractive Qualities A Man Can Have

As a sort of newbie to the adult dating world, I have met guys that I was into, and guys that completely missed the mark. Through past relationships and dating, I’ve developed a pretty good idea about the kind of man I would want to be with. A man is most attractive to me when he :

Is slow to anger

There is nothing more unattractive than a guy that can’t keep his cool. We all get upset, but that does not mean that we have to get defensive. A man that is able to think before reacting shows a high level of maturity, and character.

Has some kind of hobby

Honestly, I think everyone should have a hobby. We all need to spend time focusing on something that is not work related. I love seeing the intensity guys have when playing intramural sports, or hearing about why or how he got into comic books. Most times we don’t get paid for our hobbies, so it’s kind of cool when a guy does his passion without getting paid.

Maintains masculinity without being controlling

Many times people equate being a man with being in charge or in control. Sometimes, if a guy is not in control he might feel like he is being emasculated. A man that understands balance knows that he can still feel like a man without controlling every situation. In relationships, a man might be the captain of his team (or relationship, partnership, etc.). A good captain knows that he is an equal part of the team, and knows how to lead without making his teammate feel inferior. Continue reading “10 of the Most Attractive Qualities A Man Can Have”